Saturday, September 02, 2006

Hoyven Glaven! It's Telethon Weekend!

Frank reunites Jerry and Dean on the 1976 Telethon. Nothing remotely this memorable or interesting will happen this year.

Tomorrow's happenings will be dominated by about the 9 thousandth iteration of the Jerry Lewis Patronization of the Crippleds Fest, aka the MDA Telethon. "The Thon," as aficianados sometimes call it, is a pale fraction of a shadow of a nubbin of a frail remnant of its former glory uhh colossal weirdness and showbiz effrontery (ebbackery and eboth essideseries notwithstanding), but it seems that most of the surviving regulars will be there. If nothing else, it provides an opportunity every year to say, "Wow, Pat McCormick's still alive?" ... and then go to IMDB to remind yourself who Pat McCormick is.

Just kidding. I know damn well who Pat "Smokey and the Bandit and many other fine films and television shows" McCormick is. Except ... uh oh. IMDB says he died in July 2005 of a stroke. Damn damn damn!!!

Anyway, this year could be interesting -- well, probably not -- but what I'm driving at is that this year Jer's basing it in Vegas, so maybe there will be added celebrity hijinks as a result.

Why Vegas instead of Hollywood, where it's originated from for the last 750 millennia? Well, AP quoted Der Jermeister as saying,

"There's something about Los Angeles that subjugates it."

Upon hearing this, longtime Thon rat and ersatz funnyman Norm Crosby was heard to exclaim, "Subjugates! I didn't even know Jerry was a grammarian. Remember, to subjugate the blurb you must always reactivate the unnatural infections, not to mensa the erections to the rule."

Happily, IMDB confirms that Norm Crosby remains living.

More Thon blogging as the weekend regresses. This year for sure, we find a cure, dammit!


tony danza said...

It's telethon time? Hows comes noone'sess calleds mes yets?

Jann Carl said...

We didn't think it was necessary, Ton'. You've been camping out under Jerry's desk since last Labor Day.

desmondola said...

I had forgotten that the Telethon was on this weekend. MSNBC had a Manson documentary and I could have flipped back and forth between the two, thus creaing something that might have made sense.